I feel like that's episode started out and that's how it ended. We're still recovering from the battle in the Badlands where everyone's dreams came true and both Ashley and Kelsey went home. How in the world is Chris Harrison going to top this and the SNL 40 year anniversary they'll be competing with on Sunday? By bringing Kelsey back to talk about the upcoming Crucifixions and her panic attack that was definitely not fake - and the fact that she is just too damn eloquent for America.
Way to go producers you're already bringing the crazy levels up - and we like it.
After Krazy Kesey got through being eloquent we switch to poor Chris giving us the detail on how he simply cannot manage his harem. Honestly if you have all these women and you've been in their shoes don't out the poor girl. Especially not to the woman who keeps insisting her story is 'Amazing.' She's going to try and make Ashley's story amazing now and honestly I can't wish that on Ashley, no matter how many times she cries or forgets the other half of her shirt - or screams that she is a man eating Virgin. Get it together Chris.
And in the spirit of bringing everyone's happy level down we bring in Andi - the ex-fiance of Josh Murray. Also known as the brother of Aaron Murray and a son in a family that focuses a little much on their non-starting NFL quarterback son. Just saying. I really do like Andi, I thought she kept it together pretty well on both of her seasons and she is a knock out so there is that. Watching her explain how she felt over her broken engagement was actually very emotionally inspiring.
I think most women have been in her shoes. Where your relationship is over, you aren't speaking to each other, it was painful, and yet you still love that person so much. You're explaining to your girlfriends that you know it wasn't right and you knew that even if you worked at it - it wasn't going to work. But you still loved the Man, and being a woman we try incredibly hard to make it work. Except sometimes it just really really doesn't. I do think she set a good example for women of being open about the pain of a breakup but not letting it define you. She's moving forward and she cries and it's very very healthy. Plus honestly - her makeup held up way better than mine ever has or ever will when I cry...
Now to the real thing we've been waiting on - The Bachelor episode which we pick up at the spot we left off. Leaving the crazy to battle it out in the Badlands. Fairly appropriate. We get back to South Dakota and Megan Bell woman'd up and told Chris she felt their relationship had run it's course. More power to her I think after the 2 crazies left and battling against the Britt tidal wave she realized it wasn't worth her pride to do this any longer. Especially for a man where she felt the relationship had kind of fizzled. I love her so much for this - she's an interesting character with classic blonde moments and yet some fairly on point astute moments. My vote is I like her and if she would come do my make-up for my wedding I would be so flattered. Please Megan???
Then we segue into Jade going to visit Chris's home and enjoy a football game. She seems a little overwhelmed but not incredibly put off so you know... a mildly good start. As me and my finance lounged on the couch watching this and saw all the land, and the corn, and the cows I couldn't help but remark...why don't we live there? We love places like that and land like that and I am jealous of Chris's farm. I don't think the other girls were as jealous as me, except Britt. Who gushed about the sun and the light and how she'd LooooVVVEEEE to reinvent herself there. Honey we can all tell you wouldn't like that and it really isn't fair to Chris that you lie. You're not going to be happy with a pet cow named Bessie, let's be real here.
Then the photography date for Whitney who I do think is a great fit and rumor has it they're engaged in real life now, but if she could stop screeching I'd love it. Just love it. They run around Des Moines having random people snap their photos and in most Whitney is happily wrapping her legs around him and he's toting her tiny self around town. Cute but maybe not PG for the crowd gathering around them. She passes the friends test over drinks - and then explains she wants parents since hers are gone.
Side-note: this was big and I have major love for how she approached this. Explaining she had 20 amazing years with her mother but now that she's parent-less she wants to make sure her future husbands family loves her. Because she wants parents and she wants a life with her husbands family. I think this was very emotionally brave of her and I can't help but love it.
After this heart to heart Chris has a surprise or her - one of their photos was painted into a mural onto a building in downtown Des Moines Iowa. Which is cute in a cute way. Creepy and morbid if he doesn't pick her. Like "Hey honey here's that mural of me and that other girl I dated at the same time as you forever on this building." So if Whitney is it this is great and forever is their love painted on a building... if not Whitney #awkward
We ended the evening in a group date where Carly is once again the best thing ever, Britt is fake, and Kaitlyn is pretty real and gets a rose. Where Britt decides to take off the kid gloves and tell Chris she is disappointed in him in front of the other women and expects him to somehow make a statement of his un-dying affection for her. Kaitlyn calls her out on being rude and Carly rolls her eyes. Britt just sobs and pouts and wonders if maybe this just isn't how it should be... Honey you're on a dating show with other women. You can't win everything and you can't be a bitch when you're everyone else's least favorite. That tends to breed some animosity.
So we left there - with Britt unable to figure out if she could do this and the other girls fairly happy that her true colors are starting to shine. Hopefully tonight's episode starts the same way and everyone has their big girl panties on. #letsdothis